Excuse Library
A categorized list of funny procrastination excuses. Want the button? Go back to the
Procrastination Button.
Work excuses
- I’m waiting for the email thread to emotionally resolve.
- I can’t start until I ‘quickly’ reorganize my tabs.
- I need to align with stakeholders (my couch).
- Blocked by dependency: motivation v2.0.
- I’m pausing to prevent premature productivity.
Study excuses
- I’m letting the knowledge marinate.
- I can’t study until my desk vibe is academically perfect.
- I’m waiting for my brain to stop buffering.
- I need one more tutorial… to choose the tutorial.
- I’m doing research (scrolling).
Social excuses
- I’m in a committed relationship with ‘maybe later.’
- I can’t reply until I craft the perfect casual tone.
- I’m socially charging (airplane mode).
- I’m waiting for a sign that this plan is real.
- I’ll respond after I stop overthinking punctuation.
Existential excuses
- Productivity is a capitalist construct.
- Entropy increases regardless of my effort.
- Doing nothing is a valid state.
- I’m practicing the art of non-doing.
- The stars are not yet aligned.
Tip: share the main page as a joke. This page mostly exists so Google understands what the site is.
Social excuses